Hello dear friends, it’s been a while since I last posted; I got caught up in the challenges, hassles and issues of life.It’s great to be back, thanks for sticking around.
Happy new month, so much has been happening and I’m here to share my experience in the past few weeks and I’m hoping you would be inspired.
Life took me down memory lane,I looked around me, I searched inward and I tried as much as I could to grade myself on a scale of 1 to 10; I checked out my set goals and surprisingly I’m still way way behind.This really dampened my spirit.
I looked around me and I discovered not much is working; I’m a very optimistic person but surprisingly I allowed myself wallow and get caught up in the disappointments, challenges and setbacks life has thrown in my way these few years.
I could hear a part of me saying”Onome, don’t go down that lane, it won’t help you” and yet another constantly trying to remind me of what my mates have going for them; this part kept flashing my failure in my face and the images were heartbreaking, it became more of a torture. I childishly allowed myself go with the latter, I helplessly started remembering my years as a young girl; brilliant, quiet, easygoing with a whole lot of dream.I had my life planned, I had mapped out where I wanted to be and what I wanted to be at a particular age.But then years past, I can’t boast of having achieved 10% of my goals.
I stopped living, nothing seemed interesting anymore; I totally lost my zest for life, the zeal seemed to be fading away.I made attempt to bury myself in writing but then nothing seemed to be forthcoming.
Right there and then, I knew something had to be done; I love writing, I live for the articles I put up on my blog; all I have to do is get my device and think about a topic and every other words that I write just comes naturally and if I’m losing that part of me, that’s a massive red flag.
Decision making is one thing that should not be joked with,most of your decisions always have a way of coming back to haunt you; it could either make you or mar you. I’ve Made my own share of wrong decisions that are weighing me down presently; wrong decisions that are choking and I look back now and say what was I thinking!!!!
I don’t see myself as a failure though I made wrong choices. I realize the past has a way of rubbing certain things on our faces. I’ve had to wrestle with my past wanting to label me a failure and I won’t give in because I know the stuff I’m made of.Just at that moment, I came across a quote by Johnny Cash
“You build on failure. You use it as a stepping stone.Close the door on the past.You don’t try to forget the mistakes, but you don’t dwell on it.You don’t let it have any of your energy, or any of your time, or any of your space.”
In those moment of weakness,I realized that life is what you make it; mistakes are inevitable, there will be times when life seems to want to lose it’s meaning.There are times when such mistakes starts choking you but you get to decide how much more damage you want it to inflict on your self-esteem; you either decide to get yourself up and be better or allow the mistakes to continue to define your existence.
At a point, I began to wallow in self-pity, I kept wondering how I ended up in my situation.The tears kept welling up in my eyes and kept flowing down my cheeks, all alone I felt helpless.Then it struck me; I made my choices all by myself and living with the consequences all alone and if there’s something that needed to be done, I have to dust myself up and start working on becoming better.It’s all on me, no other person will do that for me.
Subconsciously, I regret some things I did, I blamed myself for allowing certain things and people get to me.I now understand that I shouldn’t have allowed my emotions, empathy and feelings get the best of me; some of these I had control over and others I didn’t, they began to affect me and I just felt relaxed in my state of helplessness.
Setbacks, mistakes, failure and disappointments are some of the constants in life; no individual has control over these things, they will eventually happen at one point or the other in our course in life, the greatest people on earth are not the ones who never experienced any of these but they are the ones that learnt from their mistakes, turn their failures into opportunities,saw setbacks as a stepping stone and worked on every disappointments they ever experienced to become greater. To be honest, self-evaluation are necessary every once-in-a-while but while doing that try as much as possible to turn every negativity into positivity and see possibilities in turning everything around, you can ‘re-write your own story.
Then I said to myself ” I may have made mistakes, experienced failure and setbacks, I may have felt disappointments but it doesn’t change the fact that I am one smart, beautiful, intelligent and optimistic lady and my dreams and aspirations will still be achieved no matter the obstacles. I’ve got the right attitude and a great mindset towards the past as I look forward to getting better and achieving the best of my present and future.
Dear friends,whatever the challenges, setbacks, failure and disappointments you may have or are facing; endeavour to have a positive attitude, chastise yourself of you need to, realize your mistakes and learn from them but never dwell much on it.Holding on to the mistakes of the past is quite destructive, in the words of Syrio Forel in Games Of Throne ” Each bruise is a lesson, each lesson makes us stronger.
See You At The Top.
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