HOW TO MAKE OTHERS HAPPY WITHOUT SACRIFICING YOUR HAPPINESS
Have you ever been faced with a scenario where you have to make a decision between two important alternatives….your happiness or that of another person?
There comes such times that you have to choose between letting go of all you’ve ever wanted and letting another person have their own dreams fulfilled.Making a choice becomes difficult, you are torn between selflessness or being selfish.
Each time you remember the quote “happiness comes from making others happy”, you want to let go of your own dreams just to make another person have theirs but there’s this pain and constant reminder of all you’ve set out to achieve and how you’ve planned the course of your life; a nagging feeling, a doubt and skepticism and you’re probably wondering if it’s worth it.
Of course, we all want to help the people we care about, we most of the times want to show how much we appreciate the people who have had impact in our lives but is it really a great idea sacrificing dreams and happiness for them, does it feel right, will you achieve your own happiness by making others happy?
Sacrifices are great; it should be encouraged, remember God gave his only begotten son as a sacrifice for our sins but being practical how easy is It to sacrifice a thing of value to enable another person to have their way.
Frankly, making sacrifices is not an easy thing to do, imagine letting go of all you’ve ever desired to enable others have their way.Imagine the resentment which you may eventually feel sitting back and watching others achieve their dreams at the expense of your own.
But who says you have to totally let go of all your wants, dreams, passion and aspirations just to make another happy? What if there is a way you can make others happy without having to sacrifice your happiness? Things don’t always have to follow a pattern or course, rules can be changed or at the least be modified.
Let’s read through these ways of making others happy without sacrificing your happiness;
1.KNOW THAT YOU ARE FREE TO TAKE A DECISION: This should be the first thing you should realize when faced with a situation to either say yes or no to helping others.
Bear in mind that you don’t always have to say yes to demands that won’t go down well with your needs or capabilities.You have a choice, you don’t always have to sacrifice your happiness.
2.WEIGH YOUR OPTIONS: Before you ever think of letting go of your happiness, you have to consider these things namely;
a.will I still be fine if my sacrifice isn’t appreciated
b. Will I demand some sort of gratification
c. Will my sacrifice lead to resentment in the long run
d. Will regret ever set in
Only when you can sincerely answer these questions will you know if making others happy at the expense of your happiness is worth it.
Having said this, I think you should look towards other ways that you can make others happy and still retain your happiness.
3. LAY YOUR CARDS ON THE TABLE: Hypothetically speaking, if there’s that person you are looking towards sacrificing your happiness for, if after having considered your options you still wish to go ahead to help but don’t want to totally risk doing your own thing.
You should look at sitting the person down and talking it over, doing this will make it easy on you especially when dealing with a person who expects so much from you.Make them realize why you can’t sacrifice your happiness at that particular time and what they stand to gain in the long run. If they want you to be happy just the same way you are putting them into consideration, they will definitely see reasons with you.
4. REACH A COMPROMISE: Although may not be an easy one to do, reaching a compromise gives everyone a safe landing.If for instance, you have a project you are working on which needs to be completed within a stipulated time and a friend who has been there to attend to your requests in times past suddenly falls critically sick and needs urgent treatment.Remember you are working within a stipulated time and you have to round up your project which is very important but your friend’s health is equally crucial; this is where compromise comes in, you could decide to Put your project on hold and attend to the needs of your friend totally or dedicate part of the funds meant for your project towards his health while also helping to source for more fund.Sounds practical right?
5.UNDERSTAND THAT YOUR HAPPINESS IS EQUALLY IMPORTANT: If your sacrifice will breed resentment, then it’s of no use.Have it in mind that your happiness is equally as important as that of the person you want happy.Your choices should make you happy, understand that when you are happy and radiating happiness, it creates an environment for you to make other happy.
Accept the fact that you can’t make everyone happy all the time, there are times that you should come first in decision making.If you have to help others do it if you have the means and when you don’t make them realize you can’t and be gentle but firm when communicating your decision.
Most importantly, know that sacrifices should not be made with the mindset of gratification or eternal thanks, don’t hold the recipient of your sacrifice captive by constantly reminding them of what you did and what you expect in return.This makes them feel indebted and not happy.On the hand, you will feel bad as though your sacrifice wasn’t appreciated,regret and resentment sets in.At the end, no one is happy, it becomes a lose-lose situation.
Whatever you do, know that you can make others happy only if you are.Happiness does radiate, make yourself happy today and people around you will be happy.See You At The Top.
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