Hi son,
I remember the indescribable joy in the labour ward on
the day you were born, and it seems to me that almost
overnight, you have grown into a strapping young man.
I have so much to say to you as you navigate your
path towards manhood: what it feels like to fall in love
with the woman you will marry; what it feels like to
earn your first paycheck; what it feels like to buy your
first house…The list of my experiences are no doubt
varied and numerous, but I want to share just a few
thoughts with you this Father’s Day 2015.
Be responsible
Your Mum has told you this a thousand times, and she
is right – you do need to be responsible. If you’re
involved in a project or activity, take the lead and act
responsibly. If you make a mess, clean it up. Do the
right thing. Don’t wait for someone else to take
responsibility; just do it. When you disappoint those
close to you, resist the urge to make excuses or blame
others; take responsibility for your actions and ask for
Your friends
I know you love to hang out with your friends, and
that’s not a bad thing. Hang out with them as much
as you want to, but if your friends are doing something
you know is wrong, stand your ground and do not
follow. Sometimes it’s tough finding yourself alone
because of the values you’ve learned from home and
church, but trust me on this one – never abandon your
faith or your values to follow the crowd.
Your girlfriends
With your looks and physique, it’s clear you will meet
loads of girls in your life. Treat them all with dignity
and respect. Care more about their inner beauty than
their outward appearance. Treat their bodies, and
yours, like the temples of God and don’t give in to
sinful behavior. Remember to do the right thing and
save yourselves for marriage. Remember how to
‘Counter-Kulture’. The world may make a mockery of
your faith and values but stand for God and you will be
fine. And when you do find the right girl, if she’s
anything like your mum, don’t let her go.
Be authentic
Don’t ever pretend to be who you’re not. You are who
God created you to be. Don’t hide from your true self,
and don’t hide your faith or your beliefs from others.
Stand against popular opinion when you know you
should and do it every time the opportunity arises. Be
the man. God’s man!
Pray often
You may find it difficult to find a church you like.
That’s fine. Just remember that you are the ‘church’.
Church is not necessarily a building; God is with you at
all times. One of Jesus’ names is Emmanuel, which in
a sense is the ‘God who hangs out with us’. So talk to
Him. You don’t always have to pray with your eyes
closed, hands clasped and head bowed; thinking
thoughts directed to God can be prayer. Do it often
and consistently.
Don’t cut corners
Don’t cut corners or take short cuts in your work or
studies. Don’t look for the easy way out of problems;
do that which is hard. Working hard can seem futile
sometimes but there is really no substitute for hard
work. Persistence pays off in the long run. And by the
way, sitting near the front of the class is likely to help
you pay more attention. And remember – Read! Read!
Read! The more you read, the more you will know.
Live on a budget
Put yourself on a budget and resist the urge to spend
beyond your budget. Keep an account of the money
you’ve spent and learn to save, save, save. Prioritize
what you’re spending your money on. Don’t be
influenced by your friends’ spending habits. Put your
spare change in a jar; it adds up. Use Skype or emails
to save money on phone calls. Ask for student
discounts. Book your tickets in advance. If you are
disciplined and prudent, your money will work for you.
At one point or another, you will inevitably be hurt or
disappointed by people you trust. When this happens,
you may want to retreat into yourself or you may want
to quit, but don’t! Do what a real man does – love
You will be tempted like you’ve never been tempted
before – alcohol, drugs, sex, porn…It takes character,
a whole lot of character not to succumb to these
temptations. We know that you have a large reservoir
of character. Don’t forget it. Tap into it every time the
need arises.


Call Mum regularly, not just when you want something.
Call her just to say hello and find out how she’s doing.
Trust me, this will make her very happy. Email us both
from time to time. It’s a good way of honoring your
parents. Remember other people’s birthdays,
especially your sisters and extended family. A surprise
email from you will gladden their hearts greatly.
Finally, and most importantly, I want you to know your
Mum and I love you very much and we are very proud
of you.
Your Dad

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