Here I am,all alone and lost in thoughts. …evaluating my life,thinking as far back as eleven years ago and wishing I could turn back the hands of the clock.


Oh! It’s times like this that I wish life has a rewind button that will take you back to when you made some life changing decisions and you are
hoping to get just a chance,even if it’s for only two seconds.Just the few seconds to make it right.
But alas,it’s already too late,life doesn’t work that way.Life teaches you how to lie on the bed you’ve made for yourself.No matter how badly made the bed is,even if it’s a bed filled with thorns…..You just have to live with it, most cases for the rest of your life,you made the choice and have got to live with the consequences of your actions.
Back to my thoughts. …..I’ve got so many things going through my head and questions keep cropping up.Would I have made a better choice? Would the choice have favoured me?Would it have turned out better today?Have i learnt my lessons? Will i ever make such mistakes again?These and more are some of the questions running through my head.
  I could be a bad judge of character,I tend to see people through my own eyes…..that gentle soul who takes life easy and will never hurt another soul or harbors hard feelings towards another,that soul that trusts and believes so easily with the mindset of life being only a breath away and once that breath ceases everything comes to an end, a standstill.
I thought about how life dealt me one of the cruelest blows,as a teenager I had my life mapped out,I had a blueprint of what I want to become at a certain age but then life happened.Will  I blame anyone for how it turned out? Of course not.The decision to take a not so defined path was all mine.
Just so you know,the purpose of making mistakes is to learn from them and become wiser but on the downside,it makes you becomes extremely wary of the next person.You tend to want to judge the next person’s actions by your past experience.
It’s okay if you feel this way,it’s a natural reaction,you are only being on alert trying to fish out the next person who might want to take your simplicity for stupidity,you can be likened to a prey looking out for a predator and thinking of ways to protect yourself from being devoured.But remember to always leave a room for a benefit of doubt.


  Did my experience change my opinion of people?As a matter of fact it did but being me, I still believe everybody cannot be wired the same way,I know there are some good folks out there.
Did i learn any lesson? It made me wiser and better.
A friend once said,” Everyone has an idea of an ideal choice.. When it doesn’t turn out tht way, its called LIFE”, I was able to understand that life will always happen no matter how smart,intelligent or discerning we think we are, it deals us with some blows.But when it happens,do not beat yourself up, get a grip of yourself and make the best of the blows you were dealt with.Believe in yourself and launch out there to rewrite your story,you are the architect of your fortune/misfortune. Which one will it be for you?
  Although,I am not where I had thought I would be at this point in my life but I thank God for how far he has brought me,when I look at my future,there is this joy that comes from within…..It just wipes away every hurt and disappointment, I feel fulfilled and I say to myself “it wasn’t all that bad………A greater future awaits me.

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